Revenge

            A few days ago, while talking with my girlfriend, V, I asked her if I had any Scorpio traits. Let me explain. I am a Sagittarius who was born on Nov. 23^rd. That being said, the signs change over from Scorpio to Sagittarius on Nov. 22^nd so that would make me a “cusp” (person born within 5 days of the changeover). Cusp people allegedly have traits of both signs. Me being a November Sagittarius, some people don’t consider us “real Sagittarians”, which brings me to this conversation I had with my lady.

            After she thought for a second she replied. She told me that while I’m not moody like most Scorpios are, I am vengeful, sneaky, and can be conniving when I want to be. I thought about that for a minute. My first instinct was to be defensive and immediately say “No, I’m not!” but after some thought I realized that she was right.

            In my past, I have done some pretty shady things. I have done some not so nice things and some VERY not nice things to others. However, I always did them in my own sneaky way. I was never one to be outright mean to someone. Instead I would just get them where it hurt.

            I would learn their weakness and use that as my prey. It’s easy to get mad and just want to punch someone in the face. I learned many years ago that words can cut deeper than any physical blow (especially considering I’m fairly small). Having always been really good with my words, that is what I used.

            I could reduce a person to tears just from the vile things that would come out of my mouth. Not my proudest moments, of course, but I’m being open and honest here. As I have gotten older, I have learned to tame my tongue so to speak. I am aware of what my words can do to others and I don’t want to make people feel that way anymore.

            There really isn’t a need for me to try to seek out revenge on others that wrong me. I believe in karma and all my tongue lashings were doing were breeding me more negative karma. Now I like to fully rely on the power of silence. If I have nothing nice to say I will not speak; at all. When someone tries to tear you down to the lowest point possible and you just look at them and say nothing, that’s powerful. Being a southern girl I could throw a “Bless your heart” in there but I’d rather just keep all words to myself.

            Revenge is not a solution to a problem. All it does is prolong the issue and nothing can get resolved. Going tit-for-tat with someone becomes exhausting. Nobody wins until one party gives up and I’d rather not fuel any ones fire and just cut them off and keep it moving. I’m not perfect. I’m still working on this. But as my 24^th birthday quickly approaches this is certainly one thing that I want to focus on and I appreciate my girlfriends’ honesty with bringing it to my attention. What is everyone else working on in their lives?

~Tea