Wednesday Wisdom: Use the Storm to Prepare for the Sun

In The midst of a Storm

How in the world did it become February already? January completely flew by and this being a short month I’m sure will go by even faster. That being said, let me get right into my Wednesday Wisdom post.

I had planned a bunch of posts for last week but then life through me a curve ball. Then it through another, and another, and eventually I felt like I had completely struck out all in a matter of 24 hours. Normally I keep it all together but a person can only handle so much.

I have a two-part philosophy for times like this. Whenever something happens in your life you should first allow yourself to feel whatever emotions you have and then figure out what to do next. There is a time and place for those emotions to come out but holding them in will only make matters worse. I journal, exercise, do yoga, talk to friends, family, my girlfriend, gorge out on food, whatever I have to productively get my emotions out, I do it.

So after calling my parents and talking to them and talking to V and my friends I felt like a weight was lifted off of my shoulders and was ready for the next part of my philosophy, which is “What’s next?”

Now this part is tricky because usually the “What’s Next?” phase happens a day or two after life falls apart and a lot of emotions are still fresh. But, you have to think about all the things you can be accomplishing in the time that you are essentially in the “eye of the storm”. What lessons can be learned from your situation and how can you take those lessons and channel them in a positive and productive way?

My first ever tattoo was a symbol for “Fate”. I strongly believe that everything happens for a reason and we don’t always know what that reason is when it’s happening. However, using that time when all you want to do is lay on the couch for a week and eat strawberry cheesecake ice cream and watch musicals and Broadway plays to instead make a change and make plans for what’s coming next is essential.

Being in the eye of a storm means you know there is more to potentially come your way. But by preparing for what is to come next and then preparing for what is to come once the storm passes (and it always passes), you have not only helped get yourself out of a rut but also now you are two steps ahead of the game.

There are 4 questions I ask myself to help prepare for sun when I’m still in the midst of a storm:

1.      What exactly is happening/has happened?
2.      What lesson(s) can I take from this?
3.      How can I apply those lessons to my life going forward?
4.      What do I WANT to do next?

It’s usual to feel down and drained after any storm in your life. It’s important, however, to make sure that whatever comes next is something you want to happen and something that will make you happy. It’s never a good idea to leave one negative situation and put yourself right back into another. But by sitting down and thinking about those four questions and answering them honestly and truthfully for yourself, I promise that when the sun comes out you will be ready to go and better than ever.

Let me know how you all overcome bumps in the road, hardships, or just unexpected bad news in your life and what you do to make yourself feel better. (Does anyone else like musicals and Broadway plays? If so tell me your faves below so I can check them out)

Talk to yall soon,

Literally an hour later

~Tea

Wednesday Wisdom: Don't Stress What You Can't Change!

 

You know how people say “Learn from my mistakes”? Well that’s what this is. I’ll share some of the lessons I’ve learned along the way so hopefully others can learn from them. I may only be 25 but I like to think I’ve lived a lot for my age. 

 

Today’s Lesson Learned: 

 

Don’t stress over things that you can’t change!

 

As with any life lesson, this is 100% easier said than done. You oversleep and start to panic about being late to work/class. You hit submit on an assignment and then you realize that you forgot to add something in one of the paragraphs. Perhaps while trying to make a joke you wind up offending your partner or friend. You have that initial moment of screaming four-letter words silently to yourself. You’re panicked. You’re in flight-or-fight mode. 

 

Now what? 

 

The thing that helps me take a deep breath and relax is to think of the saying “Shit happens.” I once had an undergrad philosophy professor base his entire syllabus around this saying. Essentially, there are some things that one just can’t control or change. 

 

If you’ve already turned your assignment in, it’s done. You can’t un-turn it in. If you oversleep you can’t magically add those minutes back. If you offend someone, you can’t un-speak those words or undo those actions. Stressing over those things leads to “what ifs”.

 

Why worry about “what ifs”? The stress will get you nowhere (Trust me, I know). Instead of worrying about what may happen or what could happen try these things: 

 

If something has already happened: 

·         Try to figure out what was the reason that this happened. Was it something you forgot? Was it a technical error? Did you forget something was a sensitive topic for someone?

·         Think about how you can prevent this from happening again in the future. 

·         If you realize you’re going to be late, let someone know ASAP.

·         If you’ve already submitted an assignment, consider emailing the professor (this won’t work with every professor but usually ones who don’t mind will let you know up front their leniency policy).

 

If something is going to happen:

·         Figure out what you think may happen and why.

·         Is there anything you can do to prepare for this? Can you alert anyone? Do you need to get anything documented (doctors note etc.).

·         Mentally prepare yourself for any consequences. 

 

Nobody is perfect so why waste time trying to be? We are all human. We all make mistakes. That being said, there are always consequences for our actions. All we can do is try our best and own up to when we mess up and accept whatever consequences come our way. Besides, I heard a rumor that stress gives you wrinkles and who wants to accidentally create those? :)

 

~Tea

 

 

Tea Time Tuesday! Glad you could make it...

If you follow my social media then you should be expecting this tonight so here I am!

Anyone who knows me knows that there is always a method to my madness. My blog is nothing different. Each day has a theme, which will be revealed as my posts come along. Today is Tea Time Tuesday! (Come on, I can’t have “Tea Time” in the URL and not make time to have tea with my readers.)

What is Tea Time Tuesday?

Tea Time Tuesday is simply a day where I can be candid with my readers. I want it to feel like it’s just us relaxing and talking about random life things. It’ll feel like we’ve known each other forever. Just watch. I will share things like:

• Books I’m currently reading
• My latest travels
• Juggling work, grad school, life, and blogging
• How I handle personal issues that I think may help someone else
• How I organize my space
• Cute findings in my city
• Highlights of bloggers, writers, artists, and anyone else dope that I come across
• Anything else I can think about!

I can’t promise that it will be every Tuesday, maybe every other Tuesday. Just know that on Tuesdays when you come here

be prepared for the unexpected.

~Tea

P.S.

Don’t worry, you can still visit on Tuesdays even if you don’t drink tea J 

P. P. S. 
Check out my BlogLovin Account <a href="http://www.bloglovin.com/blog/13669619/?claim=k9awbykc79f">Follow my blog with Bloglovin</a> 

Why I stopped writing...

When I stopped allowing myself to truly feel my emotions is when I stopped writing. I've never liked to open up to people because I felt like a burden, so I held everything in and journaled. I would pour my soul onto paper night after night and feel so refreshed. No emotion, no event, no conversation was left unchronicled. 

Over the years I've had my journals read by people close to me (both accidentally and on purpose) and used against me. That created an anxiety towards something that once helped to rid me of my anxiety. Even recently I would collect journals but rarely write because I was afraid that someone would read them. I was afraid they would judge me or react to my emotions negatively.

I'm done.

No more anxiety. No more fear. No more withholding. No more writers block. No more caring-what-someone-may-think-IF-they-ever-saw it.  

Writing is for me. Writing keeps me (mostly) sane. Writing is what I love and crave. 

So I will write. 

I will write and write and write until my fingers fall off or I fill up all of my journals and can't find anymore. I won't be anxious and I won't hold back. This is my life. If you want me to write nice things about you then act accordingly. 

If anyone else has been feeling this way, even if your outlet isn't writing, don't stop! Express yourself. Write, draw, paint, sing, dance, do sudoku or take photographs. Whatever you love to do to relieve stress, DO IT! 

How do you relieve your stress? Comment below and let me know.

~Tea